Come in, she said, I’ll give ya, shelter from the storm – Bob Dylan
GUELPH – Last year 1,399 women came to Guelph-Wellington Women in Crisis after suffering all types of domestic abuse.
“That doesn’t include the crisis line calls,” said Heather Field, Assistant Executive Director of the centre, of a phenomenon that seems to keep on growing. “We certainly had a huge increase in our crisis line calls.”
Officials are so far at a loss to say why there are suddenly so many calls and desperate women coming to the shelter in Guelph, often with children. Field herself will say only, “It could be a lot of things.”
But, she added, there are a number of triggers that cause women, some of whom have been in desperate need of help for years, to suddenly take the plunge to get help and get out of an abusive relationship. Field said that last year there was a Neighbours, Friends, and Family program that highlighted domestic violence and promoted places of refuge and perhaps just a friendly listener.
“Some come because of campaigns,” said Field, but she noted it is much more complicated than just that. Some speculate the dive in the economy and job losses might have contributed to a spike in domestic incidents.
Field said many women have tried “many approaches to resolve issues,” and “it comes to a point where they feel the violence and abuse is not going to end. Or, they see the effect on their kids.”
Other reasons women suddenly come to the shelter, she said, could include media coverage, movies on TV that show how to escape domestic violence and talk shows, where women hear about healthy relationships that cause them to reconsider their own.
Field said they learn, “It’s not okay to be called names; it’s not okay to be hit; its not okay to be controlled.”
In the United States, there has been a belief for years that Super Bowl Sunday is the worst day of the year for domestic violence, due to drinking and disappointed bettors – all coming after a long season of husbands glued to the TV every Sunday. In other instances, some people believe the full moon tends to bring about unusual behaviour.
Field said she knows nothing of those causes, but she has noted there are times at the centre when “the phones are ringing off the hook and someone will point out it is a full moon.”
She said sometimes women simply enter into a loving relationship “and things don’t go right.” In other cases, there are those who believe the man is the head of the household and the woman is responsible for the relationship.”
She said when women hear complaints they “can’t cook, can’t clean, they begin to believe it. They think, ‘There’s nothing I can do right.’ It’s really a hard decision” to come to the shelter.
OPP media relations Constable Keith Robb has been reporting and investigating domestic incidents for years. He said one huge factor in a large percentage of the calls is alcohol.
Wellington County Police Services Board chairman Lynda White reported to council last month that an officer who deals with domestic violence made a presentation to the board about it.
“It blew my mind,” she said of the issue and the things she heard. “It encompassed so many things.”
White said abuse comes not just through physical violence, but emotional abuse and even finances. When a spouse controls all the cash, it limits an abused spouse’s options for escape.
White said there is a high cost to taxpayers as well as the main victims. It can take an officer eight hours to deal with a single call about domestic violence.
She said at one time police could use their own judgement about laying charges, but today they have to lay charges if they suspect abuse.
Robb said domestic violence is “one of the most common calls we deal with – and one of the most dangerous.”
He added a lot of women are upset about having to call the police and they are also often financially strapped and “embarrassed. They don’t want to turn to their family.”
Robb also cited an emotional toll. That affects the victim and the children involved, but he said such cases will take a huge toll on police officers doing the investigations, too.
“The emotions involved … Our biggest fear is that it can turn fatal,” he said.
He noted he has been an officer for 37 years and has been involved in homicides that stem from domestic violence, as well as murder-suicides. He added police are getting more and more calls from teenage girls who are harassed because they broke up with a boyfriend.
“It’s devastating for some kids,” he said.
That is where Guelph Wellington Women In Crisis comes in. With offices in Erin, Fergus, Mount Forest and Palmerston, as well as Guelph, it provides a huge number of services for women who need a place for temporary shelter and protection until they can get their lives back on track.
Marianne’s Place is an accessible, 28-bed emergency shelter for women and their children leaving abusive situations. It supports women who are experiencing physical, sexual, emotional or financial abuse or stalking. The location of the shelter is confidential for the safety of the women and children using it. All of its services are free.
Staff there will help keep women and their children safe and offer support, as well as provide for needs such as :
– safety planning for women and children, getting financial support (for example, from Ontario Works);
– getting information and help;
– getting housing and finding a new place to live;
– help with lawyers, the legal system or going to court;
– help with immigration issues or paperwork;
– any issues around child support or child custody;
– one-to-one counselling, support and activities for a spouse or children; and
– fun activities and spaces for children.
It will also provide support and information to assist in making choices about safety, and that includes the support of interpreters when needed.
Any woman living in Wellington County or Guelph can come to Marianne’s Place. Within Wellington County staff can help arrange for transportation to Marianne’s Place. It has also supported women from other counties and provinces. However, it cannot provide transportation support outside of the Guelph-Wellington area.
Field said abused women can call the 24-hour crisis line and, if needed, callers and their children can be picked up. Once in safety, they will be placed in a family room, all together. Marianne Place has been so supportive to families Field said there are times women who once needed it now return to volunteer there after they are back on their feet.
She added there are “many many decisions involved in deciding to come to Marianne Place.” Those include what to do for children in school.
Women in Crisis also offers help and counselling for victims of sexual assault, transitional housing and a rural women’s support program. Field noted transportation in particular can be a problem in rural areas.
Field noted, too, Guelph-Wellington Women in Crisis is developing a speakers’ bureau, so community groups can hear from survivors of abuse just what the difficulties are in leaving an abusive relationship, and what help is available.
To handle all the work, Guelph-Wellington Women in Crisis has 48 full-time staff and 75 volunteers.
Field said many of them feel the frustration when someone calls the crisis line and then does not come to the shelter, but the organization cannot compel people to go there.
“We like to provide service, but people don’t leave until they’re ready,” she said.
Women in Crisis offers many services – all free
Guelph-Wellington Women in Crisis relies heavily on the support of the community for grants, foundations, donations and fundraising to maintain its current level of services.
It offers a huge number of services and all of them are free to users. That includes:
– immediate telephone support and information through its 24-hour crisis lines;
– long-term individual counselling and support;
– group counselling;
– connection to Marianne’s Place shelter;
– safety planning;
– transportation and/or accompaniment to court, police, hospital, shelter, and rural services;
– transportation and/or childcare may be provided if needed during counselling or group;
– advocacy, support for criminal injuries compensation, victim impact statements, restraining orders, custody;
– education and training on all issues related to women abuse or sexual violence;
– information and referrals to other community agencies and support if requested;
– information about sexual assault, incest, sexual harassment, stalking, domestic violence, medical and legal procedures and options;
– client library and resource materials;
– practical assistance;
– sexual harassment support and information;
– assessment, implementation and ongoing support for the Domestic Violence Emergency Response System;
– support and information for family, partners and friends of survivors; and
– public education presentations.
How to contact WIC
Guelph-Wellington Women in Crisis offers a large number of free services. To learn about them, visit gwwomenincrisis.org or if an emergency, call the 24-hour crisis lines at 519-836-5710 or 1-800-265 SAFE (7233).
There are several offices available in Guelph and Wellington County:
Fergus 479 St. Patrick Street West
Fergus, ON, N1M 1M2
Phone: 519-843-6834
Fax: 519-843-9945
Erin 45 Main Street
Erin, ON N0B 1T0
Phone: 519-833-2301
Fax: 519-833-7563
Palmerston 360 King St. Unit 3
Palmerston, ON N0G 2P0
Phone: 519-343-5192
Fax: 519-343-5197
Mount Forest 107 Main St. South
Mount Forest, ON
Phone: 519-323-3638
Fax: 519-323-2844
Guelph (Administration)
P.O. Box 1451
Guelph, ON N1H 6N9
Phone: 519- 836-1110
Fax: 519- 836-1979
E-mail: adminrec@gwwomenincrisis.org
March 27 is big fundraiser banquet for Women in Crisis
GUELPH – Guelph-Wellington Women in Crisis is always looking for funds and donations to provide desperately needed programs for abused women.
On March 27 at the Guelph Place Banquet Hall at 492 Michener Road, the organization will hold its annual benefit dinner and auction.
Tickets are $45 each or $400 for a table of 10. Phone 519-836-1110 or visit 38 Elizabeth Street in Guelph to obtain tickets. The funds raised will help women and children live safer lives. Last year, Women in Crisis was able to support over 1,500 women and children.
New this year is a Mother’s Day run on May 9 in Fergus. Acting Executive Director Heather Field said registration will be available soon, so check the Events section of the website for details. The 5km race is open to men, women and children. Refreshments, food and awards to follow at Beatty Park. There will be age group prizes, as well as one for the runner who brings in the most pledges.
“We’re very excited about it,” said Field.
The Women in Crisis website also lists many other events throughout the year. Another large fundraiser is the second annual Sunlight Music Festival that will be held in August in Riverside Park in Guelph.
Field said there is “a lot of incredible talent” that will be at that event.
