By Pat Mestern
For as long as I can remember Christmas in the Mattaini household consisted of getting dressed for midnight mass – I always refused to wear a hat; attending the mass and arriving home after to find that Santa had visited while we were in church.
Instead of going to bed and opening gifts later on Christmas morning, we’d all gather round the tree and open gifts around 1:30am. What fun and games we had over the years!
After the gift opening we’d sit around the dining room table and enjoy a meal of various seasonal goodies not often seen or eaten – cheeses, meats and lots of baking.
We’d all finally climb into bed around 3:30am – well, sometimes closer to 4am. When we did wake up later on Christmas morning we’d head across the driveway to Grandma Mattaini’s house to open all the gifts under her Christmas tree and then to sit down to a HUGE Christmas dinner – turkey and all the trimmings around 2 pm.
Grandmother must have gone home from the gift opening and put the turkey in the oven of her old wood stove – and she used that stove well into the 1960’s.
Christmas 1960 seemed just a little different. The trees in both homes were up and decorated. Presents were stacked beneath them but on Christmas eve there were a few more people than usual just hanging around mom and dad’s house – a couple of their close friends, sister’s boyfriends, neighbours. Those who weren’t going to take communion at the Midnight Mass were enjoying coffee, tea, cookies, pie and cake.
Around 11pm, mother handed me a present and told me to open it. I did and found an odd looking hat which she told me I had to wear to Midnight Mass. What? I hated wearing hats and this particular one was made of white rabbit fur. Strange!
Boyfriend Teddy Mestern seemed a little nervous ever since he’d arrived at the house. Looking around – people in every room downstairs – he asked me to step into the bathroom for a moment. Really?
I finally did because he was unusually insistent that he needed to speak to me alone. After we stepped into the bathroom he closed the door, dug into a pocket and brought out a ring case. Opening the case, he showed me an engagement ring and asked if I would be kind enough to marry him.
I was speechless. Then I really wanted to have a good laugh! I had to “button my trap” so to speak. After all, how many women are asked to accept an engagement ring in a bathroom? Of course it didn’t take me long to say ‘yes’.
We had been dating for several years. I was nineteen years old, young in today’s standards for thinking about marriage but OK in 1960’s standards.
If Teddy was offering me a ring he’d obviously asked permission of mom and dad. I knew that they must have given their blessing. The ring was placed on my finger and we stepped out of the bathroom into a cheering crowd of family and friends. Everyone knew what was going to transpire that evening but me.
And the hat? Teddy’s father had sent mom a cheque and asked her to purchase a hat for me as a gift from the Mesterns in South Africa. Of course she did and I had to wear that darn hat until a number of pictures were taken. Then it was taken off and tucked away, never to be put on my head again.
Our wedding date was chosen that evening, November 4, 1961 – Teddy’s birthday. Grandmother’s advice was to choose a date that a man would never forget. A future hubby’s birth date worked well.
The after Mass party carried on until 4am on December 25, 1960. But that was the last “after Mass” party that we ever had the pleasure of attending because after marrying we began our own traditions.
Of course, a huge meal at grandmother’s house on Christmas Day continued until the year she passed away – 1970.
Merry Christmas everyone!
