The gift of encouragement

William Arthur Ward said, "Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I will not forget you. Love me and I may be forced to love you."

I recently received an e-mail from a writer who congratulated me on receiving the Leslie K. Tarr award. He  encouraged me to keep on writing. It occurred to me that almost every time he writes, as his main theme he expresses words of encouragement. I wrote back suggesting he should receive an award that says, "In recognition of a lifetime of encouragement to others …" No sooner had I sent off that message then an e-mail arrived from another fellow writer. She had essentially the same message.

As I sat basking in the psychological glow that comes from the supportive comments of others, I realized that many people had encouraged me as I moved along life’s pathway.

Ellen Rossing began encouraging me as a child, took a special interest in me as teen, and continued her support until her death a few years ago. She had most influence when I boarded with her and her husband for a few months while I completed grade 9. Mother had moved from Alberta to BC. I followed on after completing grade 9, my last year in school. She argued against me quitting school, insisting I had talents and abilities that would go to waste if I didn’t stay in school. She didn’t win that time, but her persuasive arguments stayed with me and influenced my return to school years later. Thank you Ellen for being a life-long encourager to me and many others.

Mr. Glendenning, an instructor at Radio College of Canada responded to my comment, "The end at last," scrawled across the final assignment. He said in red, uppercase letters, "Education never ceases." He went on to congratulate me for getting that far, and outlined the next steps I should take in my training. I don’t recall ever meeting him personally, but his words propelled me into a lifetime of learning. Thank you Mr. Glendenning for that encouraging push.

Myrtle Wipf, a college instructor, identified me as a person with writing talents. As a mature student lacking the normal entry requirements, I had to take courses in English to make up for my lack of high school credits. Year one included a course in introductory English; we called it dumbbell English. In years two and three she taught grades 11 and 12 English. At the end of year two she encouraged me to write the departmental exams for both grade 11 and 12. I laughed, saying I couldn’t write an exam for grade 12 when I hadn’t yet studied it. She argued back. I wrote the exam for both years and passed both. Thank you Mrs Wipf for adding your encouragement to those who went before.

All of those people had the gift of encouragement. They didn’t exercise their gifts only when I faced hardships. They did it most effectively when I encountered positive or successful times. How often you and I have missed opportunities to praise and encourage others when even the littlest commendation might have pushed them to even greater things.   

 

Ray Wiseman

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