I have decided the next phase of my life involves a career change. It’s time to put all those years of post-secondary education and low-level career experiences to good use – you climb that invisible ladder of success and make the big bucks. So I am going for it. I am aiming for a position on the Canadian Senate.
You think I can’t do it? I can. While my friends were drinking beer-bongs and slurping Jello shooters, I was studying the Canadian constitution, (I really wish I was kidding). Graduating with a degree in Canadian Studies got me mocked by just about everyone I knew. Who in their right mind gets a degree studying Canada? Senator Kelly does.
I love this country. I am passionate about the things that make this nation great. I even tried to seduce the Carpenter to move to Ottawa, so I could attend the House of Commons debates. I remember dragging him to the National Archives for three days while I did research for an essay that nobody ever read, except the professor who noted, “you write really well, but this doesn’t read like an academic research paper.” That was the moment I scraped historian off my career goal list.
When I became a mother, my degree gathered dust and I was too busy making baby food and changing diapers to dust it off. But I still had big dreams; they just got shelved for family priorities. (I haven’t dusted that shelf either). Instead I watched Canadian news in between episodes of The Wiggles, and watched as media mentors like Pamela Wallin and Mike Duffy kept me up-to-date on all the Canadian politics that I was missing. Pamela made it possible for smart women to succeed in a man’s world. Why couldn’t I?
I got back to writing, but my degree had me waiting tables, answering phones, working retail, balancing journalism stories on the side and wondering how I would ever pay for my children’s tuition so they could earn their own no-guarantee degree.
I hear hard work pays off and I have worked hard to get to this point of, well, debt. Thus, I am sure, absolutely positive that my next big career move will launch me to a point where financial worries will wither away and cottages by the lake won’t have to be rented.
I have been watching Ms. Wallin and Mr. Duffy lately with great interest. More than ever I am determined to return to my Canadian study roots from a seat in the Senate. Heck, I’m even qualified. I have the degree, I’ve worked in journalism. Plus I’m lousy at accounting, so my receipts will never match up, and I can delete an email like it never happened. I just need to rise up to the Senate and then forget everything I learned about ethics on the way. Wow, that didn’t sound very Canadian, did it? Sorry.
Several bad apples (because there are more) should not ruin the whole bunch. And with my appreciation for Canadian politics, I know this whole Senate scandal isn’t unique, though I am amused to see former journalists like Duffy and Wallin act surprised by the media attention, when once it was their job to uncover the facts.
Senator Kelly faces one little problem: The Carpenter won’t move to Ottawa. Maybe we’ll buy a cottage in PEI and pretend we live there.