I have a conspiracy theory related to the freakishly warm winter weather we have been enjoying this winter. I think Mother Nature works for the local hydro-water company.
Mother Nature knows how hard the Carpenter has worked to build our family an ice rink. She made it mild enough in November to tease him into believing his framed board walls would soon stand proudly around the frozen thickness of a giant rink. Then she sprinkled just enough snow around to get him excited into thinking that maybe, just maybe, this would be the winter the rink would have a base of snow that would melt into the frozen structure we all dream about. Surely it would be better than last year’s non-existent rink. But Mother Nature is a tease.
She no doubt sneers at the Carpenter, as he stands alone in the frigid darkness of night, spraying freezing water onto the huge expanse of heavy-duty tarp that covers the lawn. She must laugh as he holds a lighter to the frozen outdoor faucet, heating it up to encourage the spout to connect to the hose he drags up from the basement, where he keeps it so it won’t freeze.
Sometimes I try to guess what our next water bill will look like. I wonder if Mother Nature gets a cut of our water bill costs right after she throws a deep thaw at us, making the water trickle into the ground. Even the squirrels in the neighbour’s trees are disappointed at the site.
Oh sure, we should have leveled the yard a little more carefully this summer, so the rink would have an easier base, but whatever. Hindsight is 20-20. Just as the Carpenter thought all was almost level and water began to rise, the slope gap was closing in and the rink was days away from completion, the weatherman announced the temperatures for this week would be around the 10-degree mark. So basically, for most of December we have watered the lawn.
I can’t believe I am going to say this, but I miss the real Canadian winters of my childhood, with snow banks you couldn’t see over and snow forts you tunneled into and giant icicles you could eat. I miss our family ice rink and the time we spent together on it. Did I mention the weight I would lose by skating after dinner every night and the way I slept better because of all the fresh cold air and the exercise that never felt like exercise. I liked the sound of kids having fun outside, unplugged from technology.
Best of all we played shinny for the love of the hockey, not the competition. Anyone could join in, all ages and abilities, and everyone simply chased a puck without the stress of being good enough. I miss twirling around (okay, some would call it flailing) on my skates with the stars overhead. Sigh.
Perhaps Mother Nature is punishing us for our blatant misuse of water in a world where water is scarce and hotly debated between nations. I will work out that moral dilemma when baseball season starts and I am bored to tears.
For now, I can only hope the temperature drops, so we can drop the puck at our home centre ice. Let’s hope I don’t drop too, like Bambi when he first stepped on the ice. Mother Nature would love that.