The tree is up. The lights are on. The little village on the shelf is lit with the Nativity scene. The house smells of pomander balls (to mask the odour of our ancient dog) and it is beginning to look a lot like Christmas, except for one thing: the naked wall.
I am perplexed by the expanse of naked wall adjacent to our kitchen. It is a sign of the times that times are changing, and with that change, the holidays feel a little less, well, merry.
Every Christmas this wall space has been designated prime real estate, spared of cheesy holiday décor for a display known as the Wall of Love. Pretty ribbons used to string every Christmas card, holiday note, photo card or family newsletter here to celebrate our eclectic collection of family and friends. The wall was like a shrine, reminding us that Christmas is not about stuff; it is about the ultimate gift of love.
Our Christmas gallery exhibit used to feature adorable images of new babies in Santa hats or families in goofy matching sweaters. We love the pictures of the embarrassed family pets shamefully dressed like elves, (with a revengeful look in their eyes that suggests somebody is going to soil their owner’s carpet later).
I love the annual card from Barbados of my cousin’s children on the beach, with palm trees instead of Evergreens. My adorable niece in the southern United States sends me pictures of her green Christmas and makes me realize that distance really does make the heart grow fonder, but it makes it hurt no less. My cousin in England always sends me a hand-written note that takes several people to decode because her handwriting is indecipherable, but it is always a good read once we figure it out.
There are the naughty cartoon cards and inappropriate jokes from my pals who love a good laugh.
The most treasured cards come from people I love who have had a difficult year where life or loss have challenged their faith in everything, and yet, they insist on carrying on; survivors. They remind me to appreciate this holiday and reflect on those who will be missed.
Now my naked wall is a statement of the times. Virtual Christmas cards have replaced paper greetings. This year we got a grand total of eight cards. Sigh. I know why; we are all too busy, too rushed, too tired. But then, I hear from my friends more now than ever through social media sites, email, text messaging and Skype. Friendship is more immediate from a distance. For that I am grateful. It just leaves me with a stark wall.
Time to inject a little “merry” into my Christmas. I’m going to take a sledgehammer to the wall and start a kitchen renovation project. (The Carpenter just fainted. Sigh.) I’m totally kidding.
Look, Christmas is just one day a year, but the reason we get all manic about it is because we want to feel the spirit of the season every day. We want to feel that human connection.
My wish for all this Christmas is that you consciously choose love: give love, receive some and heck, make some too. Remember, it is better to give than receive, but you only get what you give. Merry Christmas.