Dear Editor:
I had great expectations for global economic recovery from COVID-19 in 2025, but unfortunately we’ve have a new global pandemic that no one will be immune to. There won’t be a vaccine or home remedy that will cure or alleviate any of the symptoms.
TRUMPID-25 has been tracked directly to Mar-a-Lago Palm Beach, Florida, with its first epidemic detected in Washington, DC.
It has immediately jumped the northern and southern U.S. borders, where efforts to fight the virus are being pursued by government leaders and citizens. Threats of exposure are also suspected in China.
Incubation is between one to two weeks. Contagion time is undeterminable citizens could experience a pause midway through infection.
Viral or antibody tests are not effective as this virus changes without notice.
It is assumed everyone will develop symptoms sooner or later, with lower and middle income population being at greatest risk.
Symptoms include: increased patriotism, increased stress, head and body aches, financial burden, loss of financial benefits, extreme currency fluctuations, change of plans, restricted and or delayed purchases, lack of joy, sore feelings, bad taste in your mouth, insomnia, restless leg, loss of employment, burning in the pit of your stomach, aggression, possible addiction to mind altering substances, alcoholism, ostrich syndrome, weight gain, weight loss, hair loss, chewed fingernails … a complete list will be published as the virus develops.
Treatment option include: sit down and hold on.
Masks, gloves and anti-bacterial wash are ineffective. I wish it was that easy.
Prognosis: it is expected that this will set the whole of North America back to 1929 to 1939 economic depression.
Heather Aitken,
Fergus