‘Be an advocate’

Dear Editor:

Re: County politicians hesitant to declare intimate partner violence an ‘epidemic,’ March 21.

I was surprised at the politicians of Wellington County declaring that intimate partner violence is not an epidemic right now. I was also surprised at the results of the Advertiser’s Weekly Poll, where a majority were in agreement with these politicians.

This front page news article appeared in the same issue as a police report recording 12 spousal assault charges. I have never read so many reports of spousal assault charges in one issue. That in itself is evidence of something big going wrong in our community. 

I was pondering why people would disagree with intimate partner violence being epidemic in proportion to other crimes. Perhaps many people do not know what it really looks like. According to the Criminal Code of Canada, it includes emotional, sexual and financial abuse as well as the obvious visually physical one most people think of as abuse. 

Think of this: it is a crime to constantly yell at your spouse or intimate partner, to threaten or criticize, to intimidate or humiliate, to make fun of their beliefs, to destroy their belongings such as throwing things in anger in front of them, or to hurt their pets or even threaten to do so. These are considered crimes in Canada. 

How often have you seen this happen between couples? I’m sure everyone can think of examples. It is a crime to touch them sexually without their consent. It is a crime to withhold money or limit their access to money to control them. It is a crime to neglect to provide food, clothing, health care, and medication.

And it is obviously a crime to hit, slap, punch, pinch or kick your spouse. If you take all these criminal activities into account and the cases that actually get reported in the newspaper (the tip of the iceberg), how can anyone not agree that we have an epidemic among us? Is building more shelters for women to escape abuse really addressing the root of the problem? Is this just not making it an acceptable societal behaviour (i.e. – men have a right to mistreat women)? 

If you are experiencing any of the above crimes against you, please seek help. Tell your doctor or a trusted friend. Talk about it. Don’t hide what is happening to you to protect their reputation. 

Be an advocate for all these abused women!  

Dahl Atin,
Drayton