We grew potatoes on my parent’s farm. We harvested the winter Kennebec crop just before the first frost and stored them in 75-pound bags piled in a shed insulated from freezing. Invariably the shed filled with the distinctive earthy aroma of dirt and burlap.
But inevitably that pleasant farm smell was rudely interrupted by the second worst stench on our fruit and vegetable farm – rotten potatoes. (In case you might be wondering – the worst stink on our farm was rotten cucumbers left baking in the July sun in our greenhouses after the harvest was done.)
As soon as the vile rotten potato stink arose, we had to find and remove the source because the rot was contagious and spread quickly from potato to potato. Not to mention it wouldn’t have helped sales if folks coming into the shed to buy our Kennebecs had been assaulted by that abhorrent reek.
This ‘potato’ memory came to mind as I was reflecting on how to write in a helpful way about the increasing polarizations and fractionalizations that are happening in our culture/world and how ordinary folks like us might be able to exert a more positive influence.
But hold your horses if you are jumping ahead and applying my spud story to mean that we should sniff out and get rid of all the rotten potatoes/people in our midst – this is more problem than solution.
There isn’t room here to analyze how it happened, but we have gotten ourselves into a way of sharing life that is proving more and more dysfunctional. We could focus on who/what to blame for it but that probably won’t help much in turning things around.
One of the best healthy living tools we learn growing up is to solve problems by taking responsibility for my/our own life rather than whining in blame of others or circumstances. So if ‘I/we have gotten ourselves into a way of sharing life that is proving more and more dysfunctional’, how do I/we take responsibility to make it better?
Think of your life as a 75-pounder of Kennebecs. Your life like that bag of spuds is a beautiful thing (I have long searched but never found potatoes that tasted as beautiful as the Kennebecs we grew). Yet that goodness and beauty is too easily spoiled by malodorous rot which, left unaddressed, can grow like a vicious cancer. Obviously minimizing and removing rot are to be strived for.
Think of our lives in community – family, neighbourhood, church, school, workplace, town, nation – as a shed full of 75-pound bags of Kennebecs. For our own sake we each want to keep our bag of spuds as clean of rot as possible, but we also each have a responsibility to the other bags of potatoes to do so. Potato rot easily passes through the burlap from one bag to another. The ‘rot’ in my life easily passes on to other people and threatens to infect their healthy potatoes.
It is way too easy to wring our hands and blame “them” about the increasing polarizations and fractionalizations that are happening in our world and creating more and more rude divisiveness in our community – family, neighbourhood, church, school, workplace, town, nation – relationships.
But each of those communities is a collection of individuals and can only be as healthy and rot free as the lives of its members. It ultimately begins with ME – with ME trying my best to keep the rot of polarization and fractionalism out of my bag of potatoes/life. So I want to, I need to, stop my judgmental attitudes and belittling opinions of others and seek instead to work at healthy communication, dialogue and understanding with the people in my life.
And then it ultimately continues with US – all the potato bags in the shed – to try our best to share life together by keeping the rot of polarization and fractionalism out of our shed/community. We have very little influence over the politicians, protesters, media and internet who encourage divisiveness and don’t listen much to us. But in our smaller community circles we can build relationships of caring and trust that can transcend differences and within which healthy communication, dialogue and understanding can grow. In these circles we can help each other see and smell our rot, and then figure out how to get it out of our bags and shed.
The magic that makes this all work is HUMILITY – the self-awareness to recognize that:
– I am not perfect but a work in process;
– I don’t know everything and have much to learn, even from those I disagree with;
– disagreements and even conflicts are a normal part of relationships;
– since I am not God, it is not for me to judge and condemn others;
– it is not my job to make you think like me and have the same values and beliefs as me;
“Dear God, please help ME/US stop looking at and talking about others with derision and judgement. Please help ME/US be spreaders of kindness, care and understanding. Amen.”
